A Crack of Reality

Well here I am, just having exposed my vulnerabilities on a site that is supposed to help me make money by portraying myself as an attractive healer and energy worker that other people can trust to help them.  Can people trust me to help them when I also am going through the trials and tribulations of living in this world?  Yes!  I can help people.  I can help people get through rough times.  I can help people ease their emotional pain and free up movement and life in the body.  Here I find myself trying to convince you of something, when the reality is that we will find each other just in time, and there’s really no forcing it.  By the time we get together, we will be ready.

Here I find myself in a crack.  A crack of reality.  There is the professional world of rules and structure and trustworthy boundaries, with money and order.  Then there is the real world of people and messiness, overstepping to meet the need, poverty and lack.  So many of the medicine people don’t fit well in the structure.  The medicine that we bring is for the people and culture at large.  It’s to help balance the energy of the whole human project.  So many of us dream of life helping each other, inspiring each other, and working together in community, on teams.  But the day-to-day default consciousness is so tired.  And so afraid of the good medicine.  We know we need to connect to nature and do what is good in the world.  We know we need to love and take better care of ourselves and each other.  But we have to survive and toughen up and get used to only being able to do so much.  At least we can help take care of our family and friends and whoever we touch through work.

Something in our souls doesn’t fit.  We struggle to have the same way of living that the standard model strongly enforces.  Something is missing, the channels and culture that promote the aliveness of our souls.  The public sphere doesn’t provide a place to listen and hear each other out.  Social media is full of spectacle but short on meaningful exchange.  What can we turn to that can help us cope? 

It's the very pain in our souls that is crying out to be heard, to be attended to.  The more we can listen to what is inside, the more we can become attuned to the guidance and blessing our true souls provide.  We have access to a natural endowment of strength, patience, courage, joy, peace when we can feel through and express the wounding in the soul.  This wounding is both the source of our greatest pain and the source of our greatest strength and growth opportunity.  By making some of my wounding public I hope to inspire and help other people who may have similar struggles.